Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Stupid Hockey Tricks - Our Top 10 List for the Rangers on Letterman Tonight

Yes it's true - tonight ten of the New York Rangers will be on the Dave Letterman show - to read tonight's Top Ten List. But first - we here at Blueshirt Brothers would like to submit a Top Ten list of our own:

By the way - the ten Rangers scheduled to appear will be: Henrik Lundqvist, Sean Avery, Marian Gaborik, Marc Staal, Ryan Callahan, Chris Drury, Donald Brashear, Dan Girardi, Brandon Dubinsky, Christopher Higgins.

Probable lines tonight would be Gabby - Drury - Higgins.... just kidding. Besides - Torts would never put Drury with Gaborik...

Okay - here we go:

The Official Blueshirt Brothers Top Ten Strangest Things That Will Happen To The Rangers This Year

Number 10: Rangers win Stanley Cup - but John Tortorella gets mad and throws it at The New York Post's Larry Brooks

Number 9: Donald Brashear will get confused during a fight with the Washington Capitals and will start punching himself

Number 8: In an effort to be worthy of his ridiculously overpriced contract, Wade Redden will begin driving the Zamboni machine between periods and serving cappuccinos to fans behind the bench.

Number 7: Injury prone Marian Gaborik, while singing along with the national anthem, will sprain his tongue.

Number 6: Del Zotto - the teenage Ranger - will get grounded by Tortorella for texting his girlfriend during shifts.

Number 5: Henrik Lundqvist will get caught up in the Ranger's attacking style and will spontaneously join in the forecheck

Number 4: During Rangers victory salute - whistle-happy referees will call Sean Avery for High Sticking.
Number 3: John Tortorella will reveal that the reason he sent Ilkka Heikkinen back to the minor leagues is that the Rangers couldn't find the four letter "K"s needed to sew his name on his jersey.

Number 2: Wikipedia will sue Miika Wiikman for having a name "materially similar" to theirs. Miika Wiikman will change his name to Malka Walkman...

And the Number 1 Strangest Things That Will Happen To The Rangers This Year:

Marian Gaborik will get a game misconduct for publicly "Tweaking his Groin"

Thanks everyone - drive safely.
And speaking of Dave Letterman - a quick shout out to one of Dave Puck's heroes: Mike McIntee - the amazing writer of (1) David Letterman's official daily blog - the Wahoo Gazette and (2) those Blue Cards Letterman always is reading from. If you've never read Wahoo - one of the longest running continuous blogs in the world - you really should.

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